Badly reviewed places – El Petit Cafe

Google Maps rating: 2.9 / 5 (29 reviews)

What the reviewers said:

• 1* – “I ordered a sandwich. They were missing ingredients, but they didn’t notify us until the sandwich was already on the table. Also, there were some bugs swarming the tables. I don’t know if they were small cockroaches or another type, but it’s a problem if that happens.”
• 1* – “The man who runs this bar is quite rude. We only go when the one next door closes (Tuesdays). Not recommended, better to go to the Peruvian bar “Oh K Guay”, it is next door and offers much better service.”
• 2* – “It is one more bar that has succumbed to the passage of time, now its management is carried out by Orientals.”

My experience

The cockroaches were swarming as I approached the entrance. People were fighting inside. Sandwiches were being served with nothing but a slide of lettuce. And worst of all, there was no WiFi.

That is what one may believe happens in a 2.9 rated cafe. That’s what the reviews suggest, at least. And, maybe these people really did have 1 and 2* experiences. But not me. Not this day.

As my first place to visit on this new adventure, as soon as I entered I knew it was going to be just fine. I picked it because, out of all the poorly rated establishments in Barcelona, this one seemed like it could be down to some over-exadurated reviewers. Perhaps people whose football team had just lost, or who’s credit card had just been fruadently used for a long haul flight to Australia. I wanted to ease my way into this project, and not hit the 1.5* places just yet. I needed to be mentally prepared for those.

Waht really happened when I entered was something a little less dramatic. The waiter acknowledged me, but not with a smile. He looked me up and down, and eventually, he got straight to the point and asked what I wanted. Direct approach, I thought. I ordered my cortado and threw him a slight curve ball by asking for soy milk. I took a seat at an empty table. It’s a small cafe, and there weren’t many tables to choose from. Only one other was taken by an older gentleman reading his paper. My table had some crumbs and a bit of left over potato. I can live with this, I thhought.

When he returned with my coffee, I saw the waiter look at the mess on the table, clearly acknoweldge it with a puzzling gaze, and then go back behind his counter and pretend that neither of us had seen it. Perhaps, he hoped I would be the one taking a napkin and cleaning the mess? Who knows. Neither of us acted, both as stubborn as the other.

I slurped my coffee and looked around. There were just three people plus myself. The old man, sat at his table alone, reading the newspaper. Another one scrolling aimlessly through his phone whilst sat the bar, and another guy on the slot machines. Occasional slot machine jingles floated around.

Everything and nothing happened in these places, and I love that. It also gave me space and time to ponder, what made so many people rate it so badly? Yes, the cleansiness leaves much to be desired. Maybe the waiter isn’t falling over himself to see how my day is going. But ultimately, one get’s a beer, a coffee or whatever their heart desires, and pays prices suggesting times are not at all hard, that inflation and the cost of living hasn’t changed for 10 years.

I wasn’t hungry before I saw my messy table, and it didn’t improve my appetite much. But, I did want to order something to eat, just as another way of interacting with the chap. I checked the menu out of curiosity. I found a mix of tapas and a huge selection of bocadillos. I got up and took a look in the food counter, there wasn’t much choice. There was a measly croissant sat by itself, looking sad and lonely. And a pile of those simple muffins in plastic bags. I asked for the croissant, but, amazingly, the guy wouldn’t let me have it, saying it was old and probably not fit for consumption. I immedatiately respected him a lot more, and opted for a plastic muffin as a way of saying “thanks for your honesty and saving my stomach”.

The muffin was stale and old. Just kidding.

After enjoying the atmoshere a little longer, I paid up and left with a smile on my face. This wasn’t so bad, I thought.

Friendliness: 3/5

Greeted on arrival: No

Cleansiness: Meh. I’ve seen worse.

Look of the outside: run-of-the-mill traditional bar/cafe outside the city centre

Look of the inside: classic. Old decor, a slot machine,

Price of stuff: I screwed up here and forgot to take a note. I do remember thinking “bloody hell that was cheap”.

What was ordered: One cortado (small coffee with espresso) with soy milk. One magdalena plastic muffin.

Vegan friendly: Yes.

Vegan happy: No. The soy milk curdled a little in the coffee.

Table clean on arrival? No.

Table cleaned after arrival? No.

Atmosphere: Perfect.

Special observations: There was a fish tank in the windowsill, and a few tiny turtles in another. There was a very old sign stating “speciality coffee”. I don’t think he knows what that means these days, but I doubt he cares anyway.

Did I stay beyond what was necessary: I did. There was something pleasant about watching time pass here, watching people fiddle with their loose coins, reading a paper, gazing out of windows.

Review left: 5*. Okay I was a bit kind here, but I melted a little inside when the waiter decided not to sell me the last stale croissant when it would have been easy to.